The past few weeks/months have been a bit stressful to say the least. Living with the ever-present stress of pending budget cuts, and the flip-flopping of, do I have a job next year or do I NOT have a job? One day, it looks pretty good and then the next, it isn't looking too pretty. To top it all off, I also managed to blow my transmission in my van coming back from singing at a friend's wedding during all of this roller coaster of unknown. I only have a half-time job. I can't afford to fix it.
Last Monday, I found out with certainty that I had officially been laid off from my School District due to the continually declining Oregon economy. This is the second time that I have been laid off by this District, the first time in 2009 when I was still a probationary teacher, but this time, I was contracted, and yet I was still the only Music Teacher in the District to lose their job, once again. Oh how lucky I am.
I now have to spend my beloved Summer break endlessly searching for the ever-so-scarce Music positions in my local area, filling out application after application, hoping beyond hope that my cover letter may catch a glance from someone in charge of setting up interviews. Then if I am lucky enough to perhaps receive an interview, I try my best and hope I was good enough. So far, I have not been blessed - 10 applications, 3 interviews, 5 rejections, 5 unknown and still pending.
With all of this happening around me, I find that all I want to do is touch fabric. Cut it, sew it back together, move it, place it into patterns, sew it together some more, layer it with other fabric and batting, quilt it together, sew it some more. All I want to do is CREATE and create with fabric specifically. Fabric makes me happy.
I recently read an article that said that creative people are HAPPY people. I would have to agree. I began creating when I was a wee little child. I seems as though I always had to be creating something with my hands. My parents saw that I needed to do this and provided me with my own space in which I could instantly create. It was my "creative corner". I loved being creative! As I got older (around 11-12 maybe), my corner was moved to the 3rd floor of our house. I could have more privacy here and leave my things out without having to clean up for visitors. It was at that age that my mother sent me to my grandmother's house for a few days, and she taught me how to sew. We made a dress together. She made me cut it out from the pattern and sew it together all by myself using her machine. She did end up helping me put in the zipper.
I now have my grandmother's machine. It is my workhorse. I use it for all my straight stitch and zig-zag work. Whenever I use it, I am reminded of my grandmother and that time I spent at her home when I was 12. I loved that dress and enjoyed wearing it throughout my middle school years. It has since disappeared, but my grandmother had saved some scraps. I do have those.
My current project is a scrap quilt with 9 patches and 4 patches.
I must go work on it some more now. I feel a need to be Happy. :)